"Quest For Skin" is the 128th episode in the Skyrim for Pimps series and the 39th episode of Season 6. This episode is a "very special kind of walkthrough" for the quest "Boethiah's Calling."
Plot[]
Skin, No Skin
So after resurrecting the Dark Brotherhood, Fün feels good about Serana. She notices that Serana looks good in the sun but Astrid doesn't. Fün wants to fix this. She decides she wants new skin and decides to ask the wizard, Crotch Guzzler, to get that for her. Fün assumes he likes her and are probably best friends! She quickly fights a dragon and alright, we're off to see the wizard!
Void Crawler
So Fün heads off to Winterhold to find the wizard. She arrives to pink smoke and meteors. Finding this to be quite odd, she starts investigating and find something called a void crawler. The void crawler turns out to be Averna, she starts attacking Fün. Averna starts blames Fün for hurting her and then disappears. After this odd encounter with her old colleague, she heads over to college. She knows already that everyone is dead at the college. In fact, last time she came everyone had been slaughtered and she met the wizard who killed them all, Crotch Guzzler.
Soggy meets Fün at college
This time, she doesn't want the elder scroll to shoot out the sun, but she wants a coat of skin for Astrid. However, when she gets there she only finds S'oggy. They start a conversation, talking about their last encounter. This is the same scene as To Kill a Dragonborn in Season 5. S'oggy decides to offer the Leg of Goat Roast after learning about Astrid, since it contains the soul of Astrid. However, he changes his mind after Fün tells him that the wizard, Crotch Nibbler, is a good friend of his and that:
"If I wasn't a lesbian with two girlfriends I'd probably date him."
S'oggy gasps at the fact that they are cool with each other, and that they are both dragonborn. S'oggy mentions that he forgot the Leg of Goat Roast at his house. Only, Fün jokes around that perhaps it's his litter box he forgot it at.
Crotch ✕ Herman Melville
In the background, Herman Melville, a daedra, appears in front of Crotch Guzzler and gives Crotch a chance at revenge. Meanwhile, S'oggy balls has sex with corpses.
So not being able to locate the wizard, Fün decides to climb consult daedric lord to get new skin for Astrid. Fün assumes Boethiah, who is the daedra of murder and bad stuff, skins people all the time, maybe the daedra might have some skin lying around.
Fün climbs a steep slope and reach a Sacellum of Boethiah, where Boethiah's cultists fight each other dueling and training among each other. The talk about carving, which gets their hopes up. There are burnt corpses decorating the place everywhere however. Fün comments they look like Astrid on a stick, saying "sister." Perhaps she gets three wishes if she helps this daedra. The daedra asks Fün to find somebody worthy and sacrifice them for her. Fün claims she knows just the person.
Serana praying
Fün is thinking to sacrifice Stabby with own dagger. She goes back to the Brotherhood hideout to pick him up. Stabby asks as always if she's stabbed anyone yet.
What ever you need listener...
So Fün brings Stabby back to the Daedra worshipers and scapegoats him. Oddly after killing Stabby, he is resurrected. The voice of Boethiah is projected through Stabby. Fün Tits is the least bit respectful for the Daedra, and the Deadra fires back saying she'll "slay (her) for such insolence.
Then Stabby falls to the ground, the cultists now have to be killed to prove she's the strongest one. Fün makes fun of the Daedra who said she's more powerful than a god. What a troll. Maybe the daedra can beat 63 foxes, perhaps between 100 and 120 skeevers, how many mudcrabs 6?
Stabby ✕ Boethiah
After killing all of the Boethiah's cultists at the shrine and proving his worth, Boethiah asks Fün to kill Boethiah's old champion, a farter. And he has to kill the champion as silently and invisibly as possible. Interestingly enough, this champion is hiding out by the old Dark Brotherhood hideout. How appropriate.
At the old Dark Brotherhood hideout, Festus remains are still there. She also finds a Penitus Oculus Agent who got left here from the last attack.
Hey fox, you're weaker than Boethiah.
Annoyingly, dawnguard members and dragons are attacking her all the time. She decides that after she gets skin for Astrid, she's going to go into retirement.
Fox vs Boethiah
Finally reaching the cave where the champion is living, she calls out the Flatulent leader, Champion of Boethiah. So Fün starts killing the members willy nilly. She beats the leader with ease. Before killing the last member of the Champion's bandit group, she remembers she has to kill them stealthily. So she crouches down and stealthily kills the last bandit. This confirms Fün's suspicion that Boethiah is not as powerful as she made it out to be. She won't even get mad for not following her directions. Boethiah probably can't even kill two skeevers. She just has the ability to take over dead people's bodies. Boethiah appears again and she gives her the ebony mail she found during her adventure. NOOOOO! That's not Astrid's new skin.
"I'm better than a god." I knew she was full of Sh*t when she said that.
So Fün has to admit that she is stuck with burnt Astrid. The voice in his head tries to tell him that this may be an elaborate analogy about relationship with women and how they will start to look older. Fün immediately becomes bored of his talk.
So this time, it's time to retire for real. So she goes to do one last thing, kill Ainethach. Meanwhile. Crotch Guzzler finishes making Library Land and Cock finishes making Cock Tower.
Crotch finishes building Library Land
Quest[]
Boethiah's Calling
Trivia[]
Adam Koralik appears as guest narrator!
Video[]
See also[]
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