"Kill the Chickens" is the 90th episode in the Skyrim for Pimps series and the 1st episode of Season 6. This episode is a "very special kind of walkthrough" for the Main Questline.
Plot[]
Cock Nibbler, the hero for this season of Skyrim For Pimps and the hero of Skyrim, wakes up on what seems to be the execution wagon. Cock is in Helgen, in line to be executed with fellow wagon rider Ralof. Unlike most human beings, Cock is an invincible man. He is looking forward to being executed on the chance that he may actually die this time.
He witnesses other prisoners heads being chopped off and he cannot wait to be on the chopping block. His turn arrives and he rests his head on the block. However, his hopes of dying is dashed by the appearance of a dragon named Goat Nibbler.
"I'm here for you Cock Nibbler."
Goat Nibbler
Goat Nibbler swoops by and kills the executioner. Disappointed by the turn of events, Cock tries to get the dragon to eat him but the dragon does not seem to put too much effort in fighting him. Ralof tries to help him out and gets Cock to safety. He leads Cock into the underground of the barracks, where Cock finds his two favorite things, Cabbages and a cart to carry cabbages in. Carts are a necessity for a hobo. Cock even carried a child made of meat on these carts.
Following Ralof deeper into the cave, he finds weapons and fights his way out to the road outside Helgen. At this point, Ralof considers Cock to be a friend and suggest he go talk to Gerdur, his sister, in a nearby town called Riverwood. Cock decides this would be a good opportunity to get arrested again and sent off to execution.
Dorthe
Cock arrives at Riverwood and talks to a child named Dorthe who stares at Cock Nibbler, probably because he is a giant naked man running around. Cock complains to the adults in town for this child's odd behavior.
Gerdur
Continuing on, Cock finds Gerdur. Cock asks for sex from her and Gerdur gives him the keys to her house. However, next to the two of them is Ralof, Gerdur's brother, cockblocking Cock. Gerdur explains that she's going to be at her house in the evening but Cock is not patient enough for this and kills a chicken. This triggers the whole town, including the friendly Gerdur to attack Cock. Oddly Ralof helps out in dispatching the men in town although he leaves his sister alone. Cock kills Gerdur and moves on north to find somebody that could execute him.
Kill the Chickens!
Cock arrives at the Pelagia farm and finds Aela the Huntress. Cock recognizes her from Play Nord but they talk about very little else. She mentions something about the Companions and Kodlak.
Continuing further, Cock arrives at the city gates of Whiterun. The Whiterun Guard tells Cock to get lost since the city is closed due to the appearance of the dragons. Cock threatens the guard but changes his tune after thinking he wouldn't want to waste months taking over the city. He tells the guards that he has information on the dragons, and the guard lets Cock into their city.
He first meets Brenuin, the local drunk, who angrily yells "I ain't done nothing." Cock, being a homeless himself, sympathizes with him and decide he do him a favor by stealing a drink at the Bannered Mare.
Fart Meister
The Bannered Mare was quite lively. Brad the Bard was performing, entertaining the guests about a heroic tale of Fart Meister, who once killed a whole skeever. The hero Fart Meister was present as well. Cock dismisses Fart Meister and goes to steal ale requested by Brenuin. Saadia, however, was watching him steal and this alerts Fart Meister. He calls out Cock for justice and fights.
Brenuin the begger
It's Cock versus Fart Meister. Bard cheers Fart Meister on but it's no match for the invincible homeless man. Fart Meister goes down for the count. Cock notices that Breniun is conveniently waiting for Cock to hand him his ale at the counter so Cock hands him his ale. He leaves as one of the Whiterun Guard attacks him.
Video[]
See also[]
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