"Fear and Loathing in Skyrim" is the 129th episode in the Skyrim for Pimps series and the 40th episode of Season 6.
Plot[]
Cock is back as the main character since he started building Cock Tower in episode, Dark Sisterhood (S6E32). Cock Tower is now built and he is trying to connect with the Game Society Pimps gods in the temple of Cock Tower. Unfortunately, there are no responses from them even though he has been praying for a week. The voice in his head notices that the room smells like a trolls taint. Zanesh, the priest who enters the room, dances for his lords just in case this is the thing that the gods will respond to. As expected, the dancing did nothing.
Pile of Cabbages
So naturally, the voice in his head starts spitballing ideas on how to reach them. The voice in Cock Nibbler's head suggests killing himself and going to heaven to ask the Game Society Pimps gods why they are ignoring him. He wonders how he would go about doing this and decides that he will eat himself to death, specifically eating himself to death with cabbages. Cock goes to the magically cabbage machine that can make infinite cabbages appear and starts eating.
"Only a loser dies from eating too many sweet rolls."
Cock eats 100+ cabbages, but it only heals him. He starts looking for other ways to kill himself. He comes across a magic door and goes through it; he's still alive. He decides to drown himself in hot tub; nope the water heals him.
"It's got magical water in it that can only heal you."
He decides he will go visit the cat pit for more ideas. As Cock enters the cat pit, he immediately gets a whiff of cat stench. Cock shows off all of the Cat people he's saved, the only ones left in Skyrim due to S'oggy's serial killing. However, the voice in his head uncomfortably mentions to him that the Khajiits appear to be used as slave miners. Cock quickly defends himself saying that they are just covering their own feces. Cock explains that their poop glows due to all the drugs they consume.
Cat Litter that looks like ore deposits
The voice in his head suggest that he have one of the Khajiits sh*t in his mouth and choke. Cock doubts that would work. The voice in his head is then introduced to Sereth, a rich elf placed in the cat pit for the Khajiits to steal from. Cock also introduces him to Wh'orederv, who tells him that he has a solution for Cock's problems. It's a drug called "Snow." Snow is a special type of snow that is peed on by a magical troll. Wh'orederv being a doctor (of good feeling) prescribes this drug to him. The doctor tells him that he can snort, eat, inject, or plug the drug into his butt.
"Snow"
Cock decides to take "snow" up the butthole. Right then, Brad appears before Cock as he takes drugs. Brad explains that he is on vacation because his dragon's taint is chapped and needs a break from being suck on. Brad becomes witness for the following things that happen.
Due to the effects of the drugs, Cock goes on a sexual escapade. He has sex with horkers, has sex on a table, masturbates to a grandmother, does a goat, and much more, all revealed to the public by Brad's pop song cover album.
Cock, exhausted, wakes up to a pile of women on floor. Brad tells him that Cock did all of these women. This is not a concern for Cock as he needs more drugs. With no moment to lose, he goes back to Wh'orederv to get more. Unfortunately for him, the doctor is out of the drug. Wh'orederv tells him that he has to go to Solstheim and get a magic troll to pee on the snow. Wh'orederv demands 3000 gold and a bucket for information on how to obtain the that pee from the troll. Cock tells the doctor that he does not have a bucket but is able to strike a deal to give him 3000 gold and infinite cabbages in exchange for the information instead. Wh'orederv passes on the information telling him that the troll's prostate gland must be massaged through its butt to obtain the pee.
Obtaining that valuable information, Cock approaches Brad and tells him that he and Brad are going to go to Solstheim. Brad hesitates but ultimately decides to follow Cock to the snowy island of Solstheim. Once at Solstheim, Brad reaches into the trolls butt cavity and milks out the pee. Cock immediately scoops that up and takes the drug. He immediately gets a boner. Cock tells him that he has a boner and Brad suggest he do the troll or find people at a village that they passed earlier called Skaal Village. Once at the Skaal Village, Cock Nibbler sees Storn on the ground and Frea in morning. Cock drugs Frea and they have sex in a cabin.
Brad × Troll
Cock quickly satisfies himself. Soon after, there is knocking on the cabin door. It's Ancient Traveler. Cock, still on drugs, does not recognize him and makes a pass at him. Ancient Traveler shakes it off and tells him that today is the third turdas of the third month. He reminds him what he told Cock originally in the episode Main Quest Completed; stop Fun Tits and Crotch Guzzler's fight in Library Land.
Cock, however, interrupts him by masturbating. Ancient Traveler performs some magic and Cock wakes up from the trance. Cock is told that he was having sex with everything. Cock denies that this ever happened and it couldn't happen because it was against his Game Society Pimps religion. Cock blames Brad saying he roofied him.
"You're a horrible human being, Brad the Bard."
The Ancient Traveler tells Cock that he has to go to Library Land stat! Cock, however, is not feeling it. He complains that his gods abandoned him the last time he saved Skyrim and he explains that he has no motivation. The Ancient Traveler tries to get him go by claiming that his gods ARE real and that this is his moment to show the gods that he can become a hero.
Cock now totally motivated by his pep talks, orders Brad to Alfred Text a dragon to take him to Library Land and leaves to stop the fight between Fun Tits and Crotch Guzzler.
Right after Cock leaves, Brad asks the Ancient Traveler if the gods Cock was preaching on about was real. Ancient Traveler responds that he was just BS-ing.
Video[]
See also[]
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